About Leftman Brothers

Leftman Brothers is a cutting-edge financial institution with over a quarter-century of unparalleled expertise in aggressive growth strategies, opaque transactions, and the fine art of creative accounting.

From our prestigious headquarters — located in the basement of a once-thriving strip club — we deliver bespoke financial services to discerning clients who prize flexibility far more than legality.

Founded on the timeless principles of obfuscation, monetization, and plausible deniability, Leftman Brothers has evolved from a humble backroom laundering operation into a global behemoth managing trillions in assets — both real and imaginary.

Whether it is shorting humanitarian crises, investing in speculative ghost ventures, or innovating entirely new forms of debt, our mission remains clear: maximize your margins, minimize your oversight.